What size should I make?

This is my first sweater and I don't know what size to go with. I bought enough yarn to do up to 42/43. I have a 36 inch bust, but I don't want it to be too form fitting, so I thought I would go up a size or two. but I don't want it to be super oversized either. I know, I know. What a general question, probably not an exact answer to it. But I figured someone out there can at least push me in the right direction.

I am hoping to start my cardi any day now. I am forcing myself to finish the match to my first sock ever before I do anything else. The socks are for my hubby, who anxiously awaits them. Once he gets them, I don't think there will be any issues with the money I spent for Ribby :)

And now for my two beginner questions. I was reading through my pattern and there are two things that stump me.

1) In the section for the Back Armhole Shaping, it says "work all WS row stiches as they appear in established pattern". That's not the same as "work stiches as they appear", is it? I think this is one of those questions that if I were actually knitting at that point I would "see" what I should do. But it doesn't hurt to know ahead of time either.

2) "Work armhole and neck shaping as for left front, reversing all shapings, but wherever there is SSK, work K2TOG" Is this a literal thing?

O.K. I think I am going to put the pattern away until I start. The more I read over it, the more questions I have. Note to self: Less thinking, more knitting Liz.

And last but not least, I love all the pictures you guys are sharing. I am slightly jealous of the two tone cardis. I couldn't decide on a second color, so mine is just plain ol' chocolate brown.